12 date nights for couples who've done dinner forty times
Long-term love needs newness, not grand gestures. Twelve date nights that feel like the early days, at home and out.
The Love Desk · 2 min read
You love each other. You also know exactly what the other will order, which side of the bed they'll take and how the evening will end: sofa, show, sleep. Comfortable is good. But a little newness is what makes long-term couples feel like they did at the start.
The trick isn't spending more. It's doing something neither of you has done together before.
At home
1.The tasting night
Five cheeses, five chocolates or five wines from the corner shop. Score them blind. Argue passionately.
2.Cook a country
Pick a cuisine neither of you can make, play its music, and attempt the whole menu.
3.The question night
Turn off the TV and ask each other questions you've never asked. "What did you want to be at twenty?" "What's something you've never told me?"
4.Kitchen disco
Each of you makes a playlist of songs from the year you met. Dance badly. Sing worse.
5.Recreate your first date
Same food, same music, same awkward questions, now with inside jokes.
6.No-phones night
Both phones in a drawer from 7 p.m. Board games, a bath, a long conversation. It's amazing how much evening there suddenly is.
Out
7.Be tourists in your own city
Do the thing every visitor does and you never have. Bonus points for photos.
8.Take a class together
Dance, pottery, life drawing. Learning something new side by side is excellent for couples who think they know everything about each other.
9.The surprise date
Take turns planning a mystery evening. The other person just has to turn up in the right clothes.
10.Live music, standing up
A small gig, close to the front. Loud enough to lean in.
11.A night in a hotel in your own city
Somebody else's sheets, room service, no washing-up. Feels like a holiday without the travel.
12.Do something slightly scary
Climbing, a fairground ride, karaoke. A little adrenaline shared with someone is a very old route to feeling close.
"I don't need anything fancy. I need him to plan it. When he's thought about it, I feel wanted all over again."
"I love when it's playful. Competing at something, laughing at each other. That's when I remember why I fell for her."
Bottom line
Newness beats money. Try one thing you've never done together this month, and take turns being the one who plans it.
